We’ll do the writing.

You take the credit.

If you’re staring at the blank inside of a card, here's the inspiration you need to write something, organised by occasion, sorted by how much effort you're feeling today.

No one needs to know it took you four seconds.

    • I got you this card. That's the gift.

    • Another year older. Not sure about wiser, but we're rooting for you.

    • I was going to write something meaningful. Then I didn't. Happy Birthday.

    • Ageing is going… noticeably. But you're pulling it off.

    • You're not old. Just further along than most.

    • Hope this card lowers your expectations for the gift. Happy Birthday.

    • I'd say you haven't changed, but that would be a lie. Still tolerable. Well done.

    • Hope this year treats you better than the last one.

    • You deserve good things. This card is a start, at least.

    • You're doing great. Considering.

    • Let's not talk about how old you are. Let's talk about cake.

    • Happy Birthday. You're one of the better ones.

    • You didn't have to do that. But you did. So, thank you.

    • Appreciate you more than this card suggests. Which is a lot.

    • You make things easier. That's not nothing. That's everything, actually.

    • Thanks for being someone I can rely on. Truly.

    • This is me being sincere. Don't get used to it. But — thank you.

    • You helped and I noticed. That matters more than I usually admit.

    • Thank you. Genuinely. The non-ironic version.

    • You're one of the good ones. Just wanted to put that in writing.

    • I don't know what to say. But I wanted you to know I'm here.

    • Thinking of you. No other words needed right now.

    • This is rubbish and I'm sorry you're going through it.

    • You've handled a lot this year. More than most people could. I see that.

    • There are no right words. But there is this card, and the person behind it.

    • I'm really glad you're in my life. Even if I don't say it enough.

    • Just checking in. You don't have to be okay. But I hope today is a bit easier.

    • Proud of you for getting through it. Even on the days it didn't feel like getting through anything.

    • You did it. Against the odds and probably on very little sleep.

    • Proud of you. This is a big deal and you're allowed to enjoy it.

    • Congrats. You've earned this more than you probably realise.

    • Look at you. Going and achieving things. We love to see it.

    • I knew you'd get there. I was patient about it, but I always knew.

    • This is the bit where I say something encouraging. Consider it said. Congrats.

    • Well done. You should be very pleased with yourself. We are.

    • Huge news. Huge. I'm very normal about it. Congratulations.

    • Glad you exist. That's the whole message.

    • You're one of the better people I know. And I know some decent people.

    • Thanks for being you. It's working really well.

    • You make things better just by being in them. I noticed.

    • Still tolerable after all these years. Well done, honestly.

    • I like you. There. I said it. It's in ink now. No take backs.

    • You're the kind of person people feel lucky to know. I'm one of those people.

    • Big love. The non-embarrassing kind. But still — big.

    • Hope today is a good one.

    • You're welcome. (For the card. And generally.)

    • I nearly didn't get you anything. Then I remembered you deserved something.

    • This seemed easier than saying it out loud. But it's still meant.

    • Cheers to you. Whatever you're celebrating — you've earned a cheer.

    • All the best. The sincere kind, not the brush-off kind.

    • Just wanted you to know someone was thinking of you today.

    • That should be enough. Don't overthink it.

A few tips

  • Less is more. Three sentences that mean something beat a paragraph that doesn't. Pick one idea. Say it well. Stop there.

  • Name them. Starting with their actual name makes any phrase feel instantly more personal. "Sarah — glad you exist." Works every time.

  • Don't explain the joke. If you're going dry or cheeky, commit. Explaining why it's funny is the fastest way to make it not funny.

  • Sign off like yourself. "Love," "Cheers," or just your name — all fine. "Warm regards" in a handwritten card is a red flag. Be human.